1 Peter 3:1–7 (ESV) — 1 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, 2 when they see your respectful and pure conduct. 3 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— 4 but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. 5 For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, 6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. 7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.
1) Want the change that
Ephesians 5:25–30 (ESV) — 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body.
2) God changes
1 Corinthians 7:12–16 (ESV) — 12 To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. 13 If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. 15 But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. 16 For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?
Challenge
Baby Step: Over the next 7 days, pray for your spouse’s relationship with the Lord while praying for your guidance in living out your faith before them.
Maturing Step: Download RightNow Media and find a study to start (together if they’re willing). https://app.rightnowmedia.org/join/thewayoflifechurch
Talk it Out
If there was one thing you could change in your spouse, what would it be and why?
Read 1 Peter 3:1-7, Ephesians 5:25-30, and 1 Corinthians 7:12-16. How do these passages give insight into what type of changes God is interested in making?
Each of those passages describe a person doing the will of God to a someone they are in relationship with who may not be doing the will of God. What can be hard about being in such a relationship? What kind of impact would it make on the marriage if both were walking in the will of God?
In 1 Peter 3:1-6, the passage calls on the wife to focus on the inside more than the outside. How might this relate to the changes we are concerned with versus the changes God is concerned with?
Identify the act of faithfulness commanded in each of those passages and the impact on the relationship. How does this motivate faithfulness to God in marriage?
1 Corinthians 7:12-16 presents both a promise and possibility for a believer in a marriage to an unbeliever. How might his motivate a believer in marriage to obey God in the relationship no matter what?
The first question asked what change would you like to see in your spouse. What change would God like to see in you? Pray and plan to make a step in that direction. Testify about making that step in your next talk.