For Better Or For Worse
Steve Coad
Part of The Vow—If you aren't working on your marriage, you are working on your divorce.
February 27, 2022

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Message Notes:


Standard Wedding Vows - “to have and to hold, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part”


Part 2

For Better Or For Worse


Better = Healthier. Happier. More effective. In the process of recovering. Less unwell.


Worse = Less healthy. Not as happy. Less effective. In the process of decline. Unwell.


BOLD STATEMENT FOR BELIEVERS TO PONDER:

Unless there is Abuse, Abandonment, or Adultery … There is no scriptural support for someone to leave their marriage just because they don’t like the person their spouse is growing into.


VERY IMPORTANT YOU REMEMBER THIS:
The grass is greener on the side that gets watered.


MAIN IDEA:

For better or for worse means outside of adultery, abandonment, or abuse …

We must love them in their tough times with radical acceptance.


Matthew 19:9
I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.” NIV


1 Corinthians 7:15
But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances [NASB in such cases]; God has called us to live in peace. NIV


MAIN IDEA:

For better or for worse means outside of adultery, abandonment, or abuse…

we must love them in their tough times with radical acceptance.


1. Keep fighting for them. Keep pursuing selfless love over selfish love.


1 Corinthians 13:4-7
4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous (of others) or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. NLT


2. Give yourself permission to fight for your own health as well.


Jeremiah 17:7-8
“But blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence. They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green, and they never stop producing fruit.” NLT‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬


John 15:4-5
Remain in me, and I will remain in you. For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful unless you remain in me. “Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. ‭‭ ‭NLT‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬


John 16:33
“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.”” ‭NLT‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬


3. Love them the way THEY need to be loved. Not the way YOU need to be loved.


5 Love languages:

Quality Time, Physical Touch, Words of Affirmation, Gift Giving, Acts of Service


When you give your spouse the love THEY need…everything gets better.
When you withhold from them…everything gets worse.


MAIN IDEA:

For better or for worse means outside of adultery, abandonment, or abuse…

we must love them in their tough times with radical acceptance.


Matthew 16:25
If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it. NLT


Ephesians 5:21-33
21 And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. NLT


God wants you to focus on what YOU ARE NOT GIVING

not what you are NOT GETTING



1. Keep fighting for them. Keep pursuing selfless love over selfish love.
2. Give yourself permission to fight for your own health as well.
3. Love them the way THEY need to be loved. Not the way YOU need to be loved.


Challenge:

IF YOU ARE MARRIED – What are some things you can do to fight for each other more?

IF YOU ARE SINGLE – Are you learning to let Jesus be your source and not another person?


If you prayed the prayer to start fresh with God today text “startagain” (one word) to 97000 so we can connect with you and help you take the next steps in this amazing decision.


My Notes:


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