1. Who I am is simply a

Reveal Answer

of the most High King.

Am I kind? Consistent? Strong? Am I truly loving? How do I become those things to my children, each and every day?

Ultimately, the question I’m asking is:
Do I have control over my children and my household?

Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.
She opens her mouth with wisdom,
And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her: —Proverbs 31:25-28 NKJV

2. The

and

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process is not comfortable. That’s because it isn’t meant to be comfortable. God will change you by any means necessary.

• Sanctification - to be set apart for God’s special use and purpose.
• Refinement - the process of being purified through opposition and through discipline.
  
  

3. Bottom line: God was and is

through it all.

4. Those clothes are

you, not

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by you.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. —Psalm 23:4 ESV

He is with me, watching over me and guiding me. And not only me, but my children as well. As a mom, I do what I can. God will handle all the rest.

5. The truth remains that God has a

, He is

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, He is

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. Whatever the outcome may be, these things are true. His plans are always perfect.

6.

is the power to influence those around you and yourself.

7. We

control others, and we will even

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to control ourselves.

She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness.She watches over the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. —Proverbs 31:26-27 NKJV

Author Edwin Friedman is quoted in Sharon Hodde Miller’s book The Cost of Control as describing this reactivity “as one of the key ways we forfeit our influence. He defines reactivity as ‘the vicious cycle of intense reactions of each member to events and to one another.’”


Friedman tells us that: “When this happens, both parties are attempting to win by controlling the other’s perspective. But instead of influencing each other, they are only becoming more entrenched, more adversarial, and most likely, less rational. Like all forms of control, reactivity accomplishes the opposite of its goal.”

8. I will

my household and I

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eat the bread of idleness. I will remain

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, watching over my children as I’m called to do.

9. As the mom, you are expected to be the

of the family, not the

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.

Friedman says, “…the only way to break this cycle is for someone to be a non-anxious presence. Rather than react, they listen, they remain sincere, they maintain a healthy emotional distance, they are appropriately playful, and they intentionally avoid reactive interactions.”

10. Being the thermostat,

and

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regardless of chaos around me, allows me to become a woman whose “children rise up and call her blessed.”

11. Each day is another opportunity to try again; to

more of the control I try to grasp onto.

12. Our armor from

is not meant for us to give to our kids. God gives them

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armor. There’s enough to go around.

13. I am

own. And so are my

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.

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Next Week: Paul’s Letter to the Romans: The Power of the Gospel (Romans 1 & 2)