What Is Self-Control?
Part of A Fruitful Marriage
May 5, 2024

The Fruits of the Spirit in marriage are only attainable through the Spirit of God. We do not produce them in ourselves, God produces them in us as we follow him and allow him to fill us!

“For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age, waiting for our blessed hope, the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all lawlessness and to purify for himself a people for his own possession who are zealous for good works.” —Titus 2:11-14

Context: Paul is writing a letter to Titus, a leader in the early church and having him setup new elders in the house church network that met on the Isle of Crete.

“There has never been, and cannot be, a good life, without self-control.” —Leo Tolstoy

You Lack Control Over

You cannot control


You cannot control your family
You cannot control your co-workers
You cannot control your

Unhealthy ways we try to control others:

  1. Withholding Affection
  2. Criticism
  3. Silent Treatment

Self-Control Is The Only You Have

“We talk about “circumstances over which we have no control.” None of us have control over our circumstances, but we are responsible for the way we pilot ourselves in the midst of things as they are.” —Oswald Chambers

Areas of Self Control:

“Now, think with me about those who are demi-disciples—that is, part disciples, half disciples. These are men and women who bring their lives partially under the control of Christ, but they leave whole other areas outside His control. Long ago I came to the conclusion that if Jesus Christ is not controlling all of me, the chances are very good that He is not controlling any of me.” —A.W. Tozer

Prayer & Journaling Points

  1. Father, how can I give you more control over my life?
  2. Lord, what areas of my life do I need to give over to you?
  3. Jesus, what are some ways I can show my spouse I love them and trust them this week?