STEP 2: FALSE EXPECTATIONS
The elder brother mistakenly believed that he had to earn anything that would come from his father but the truth was that he could have been enjoying everything the father had all along. We’re going to ask God to reveal to us all of the false expectations and standards that we have felt we have had to meet in order to feel good about ourselves, to measure up or to be acceptable. Pray the following prayer:
Loving Father,
I thank You that in Christ all of Your expectations of me have been fully met (Romans 8:4) and that You have forgiven me all my transgressions and cancelled out my certificate of debt by nailing it to the cross (Colossians 2:13-14). I confess that I have believed the lie that I have needed something more than Christ in order to gain or maintain acceptance with You and others. Please would you reveal to me now all the expectations, standards and demands that I have been living under, by which I have sought to become more acceptable and feel less guilty, so that I can return in simple faith to relying just on Christ’s work on my behalf. I ask this in the name of Jesus Christ, who died for me. Amen.
Now spend some time just between you and God considering the following areas and write down the specific expectations you have felt:
- Expectations you wrongly believed were from God
- Expectations from parents and family
- Expectations from teachers
- Expectations from churches and church leaders
- Expectations from employers
- Other false expectations, such as ____
Then for each false expectation that you have listed, say the following:
I renounce the lie that I have to live up to the expectation of
You may like to write the false expectations you have believed on a separate sheet of paper and then tear it up to symbolize that you choose from now on to trust in Jesus alone to make you right with God. Then move on in freedom and confidence!
The truth about our Father God
Having a wrong view of God’s character and His expectations of us will hinder the development of a close intimate relationship with Him. The next part of this step is designed to give you an opportunity to renounce out loud the lies you have believed about God, and to affirm the truth about His character. The Bible references are there for you to look up at home. We encourage you to do this, especially those truths that are hard for you to receive today. Meditation upon the truths of who God is can be one of the most important aspects of your freedom and healing in Christ.
| I renounce the lie that my Father God is: | I joyfully accept the truth that my Father God is: |
|---|---|
| distant and uninterested in me. | intimate and involved (Psalm 139:1-18) |
| insensitive and uncaring | kind and compassionate (Psalm 103:8-14) |
| stern and demanding | accepting and filled with joy and love (Romans 15:7; Zephaniah 3:17) |
| passive and cold | warm and affectionate (Isaiah 40:11; Hosea 11:3-4) |
| absent or too busy for me | always with me and eager to be with me (Hebrews 13:5; Jeremiah 31:20; Ezekiel 34:11-16) |
| impatient, angry or never satisfied with what I do | patient and slow to anger and delights in those who put their hope in His unfailing love (Exodus 34:6; 2 Peter 3:9; Psalm 147:11) |
| mean, cruel or abusive | loving and gentle and protective (Jeremiah 31:3; Isaiah 42:3; Psalm 18:2) |
| trying to take all the fun out of life | trustworthy and wants to give me a full life; His will is good, perfect and acceptable for me (Lamentations 3:22-23; John 10:10; Romans 12:1-2) |
| controlling or manipulative | full of grace and mercy, and gives me freedom to fail (Hebrews 4:15-16; Luke 15:11-16) |
| condemning or unforgiving | tender-hearted and forgiving; His heart and arms are always open to me (Psalm 130:1-4; Luke 15:17-24) |
| nit-picking or a demanding perfectionist | committed to my growth and proud of me as His growing child (Romans 8:28-29; Hebrews 12:5-11; 2 Corinthians 7:14) |
| I am the Apple of His Eye! |
Now look back over the list and mark any truths that you find difficult to believe. We would encourage you to look up the Bible references and then use the following prayer to process these truths at a deeper level. You may like to continue to use the prayer every day until you know the truth in your heart.
Dear Heavenly Father,
I confess and repent of believing the lie/lies that you are