
Fear Into Freedom | Week 3: Rejection To Acceptance
False Belief: I must be approved by others to feel good about myself.
Are you a “people pleaser?”
- Signs you are an Approval Addict:
- You crave compliments.
- You self-promote.
- You have difficulty making decisions on your own.
- You are often overly sensitive.
- You get hurt easily.
- You hate confrontation.
- You always fall for flattery.
- You have a hard time saying “No.”
- You compromise your values.
God’s answer for the approval of others is reconciliation.
Reconciliation = those who were enemies have become friends.
Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior. But now he has reconciled you by Christ’s physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation. —Colossians 1:21–22 (NIV)
And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory. —Ephesians 1:13–14 (NIV)
Today’s Truth: Our longing for approval is ultimately fulfilled when we know our true identity is friendship with Christ.
As Jesus went on from there, he saw a man named Matthew sitting at the tax collector’s boot . “Follow me,” he told him, and Matthew got up and followed him. —Matthew 9:10 (NIV)
Recognize that the fear of man can
us into not trusting God. Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is kept safe. —Proverbs 29:15 (NIV)
When we are mature and secure enough in our identity in Christ, we can handle any criticism with
.
Who we really serve
who we would rather please. Obviously, I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant. —Galatians 1:10 (NLT)
Realize we already have
. On the contrary, we speak as those approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel. We are not trying to please people but God, who tests our heart. —1 Thessalonians 2:4 (NIV)
And a voice from heaven said, “This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.” —Matthew 3:17 (NIV)
We can experience the
of who we are meant to be. While Jesus was having dinner at Matthew’s house, many tax collectors and sinners came and ate with him and his disciple. When the Pharisees saw this, they asked his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” On hearing this, Jesus said, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sic. But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.” —Matthew 9:10–13 (NIV)
All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through you. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God. —2 Corinthians 5:18–20 (NIV)
Theme: Friend of Sinners Like Me
Reflect Together: What impacted you most from Sunday’s message? How do you struggle with being an “approval addict” based on the checklist shared?
Share Together: What was a difficult task that you were looking to quit but were stuck with and are grateful that you saw through? Why was it rewarding?
Read Together: Matthew 9:9-13
Discuss Together:
- Though it may be subtle, why is it significant that Jesus saw Matthew as a man first, not as a low-life tax collector?
- How significant is it to you that Jesus sees you for who you are, not what you have done?
- Matthew wrote about this encounter with Jesus, and it was about himself. What do you think he felt at the moment when Jesus invited him to come follow him? Would you spontaneously do the same? Why or why not?
- Why do you think it bothered the Pharisees so much that Jesus ate with “sinners?” Why would this still bother churches or religious people today?
- What is involved in our role as a “friend of sinners?” What is our risk in doing so?
- What excites you about joining Jesus’ mission of not reaching the healthy but instead the sick? How do we do this? Where does this bring tension in caring for those who have already arrived in the church?
- What do you think Jesus means when he quotes the prophet, Hosea, “Go and learn what this means, ‘I desire mercy and not sacrifice’?” How does this relate to the motive of why we follow Jesus and fulfill His mission?
- How shall we pray we can reach out to sinners like us and that there is a place for them as well?
Pray Together: Share needs and ways God has answered prayers in your group.