Relate and Navigate

You are a person with emotions, living in a world with other people who have
emotions. If you will not acknowledge this, you will live at a disadvantage in the
realms of self-leadership, family, church, work, play, friendship, and civil
governance.

Why are these concepts critical?

• For the good of all who will hear and act on what Jesus says (Matthew 7:24-
  27)
• Equipping us to build one another up (Ephesians 4:11-16), bear each
  other’s burdens (Galatians 6:2), and encourage each other toward good
  works (Hebrews 10:24)
• Evangelism & reputation (1 Thessalonians 4:10-12)
• Evangelism & apologetics (1 Peter 3:15)
• Political engagement (Romans 13:1-7; Micah 6:8)

Where many people see emotions as obstacles to healthy connections, we must
train ourselves to see them as opportunities to know and be known

Let love be genuine… 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. —Romans 12:9a, 15

What emotions do: MOTIVATE | COMMUNICATE | RELATE | ELEVATE

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. —Matthew 6:21

HAPPINESS – something I love/value/treasure is RECEIVED
SADNESS – something I love/value/treasure is LOST
FEAR – something I love/value/treasure is THREATENED
ANXIETY – something I love/value/treasure is UNCERTAIN
ENVY – something I love/value/treasure is GIVEN to others
ANGER – something I love/value/treasure is DEPRIVED by others

A Script to RELATE (from “Untangling Emotions” by Groves & Smith)

1. “This is what it was like for me. What was it like for you?”
   

   Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another. —Ephesians 4:25

2. “So this is what it was like for you [summary]? Am I hearing you right?”
   If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame. —Proverbs 18:13
3. “How can we do this differently?” (And possibly) “This must change.”

Lifehack: Use the right words AND right tone

A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger. 2 The tongue of the wise makes knowledge acceptable, But the mouth of fools spouts folly. 3 The eyes of Yahweh are in every place, Watching the evil and the good. 4 A soothing tongue is a tree of life, But perversion in it crushes the spirit. —Proverbs 15:1–4

Lifehack: Choose to be a strong SENDER and RECEIVER of messages

We who are strong have an obligation to bear with the failings of the weak, and not to please ourselves. 2 Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, to build him up. 3 For Christ did not please himself, but as it is written, “The reproaches of those who reproached you fell on me.” —Romans 15:1–3

Be a STRONG SENDER for weak receivers
- Gentle (2 Timothy 2:25)
- Respectful (1 Peter 3:15)
- Patient (2 Timothy 4:2)
- Reasonable (Philippians 4:5)

Be a STRONG RECEIVER for weak senders
- Assume positive intent (1 Corinthians 13:7)
- Overlook harsh/disrespectful delivery IN ORDER TO FOCUS on the primary issue (Proverbs 19:11)

This will take TIME! Understand the cost and then pay the price

Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, 16 making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. 17 Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. —Ephesians 5:15–17