Gossip
Next Steps
Part of Just Like Judas
May 1, 2022

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Gossip - Next Steps

Summary

Gossip is a major problem that impacts everyone, but what is a gossip? It is, “a person who habitually reveals personal or sensational facts about others, rumor or report of an intimate nature” (Webster). People gossip to feel superior, to feel like they are part of the group, or when they are bored, envious, or want attention. Some do it with a more malicious intent; they gossip to harm someone by destroying their reputation, or intentionally spreading false information.

How can Christians talk to and treat people in order to demonstrate the love of Christ? First, retrain your brain that gossip isn’t good. Gossip is always fueled by at least two people: someone who shares it and someone who listens to it. Therefore, refuse the temptation to listen to gossip. Instead, speak life into people’s lives. We need to train our brain to speak words of life to others, and when talking about others. When tempted to say something about someone, imagine that person is standing right next to you. What would you say? Ask yourself: Is what I am about to say important, uplifting, and accurate?

  1. Has gossip ever caused a rift between you and someone else, especially a friend or relative? Were you able to be reconciled? How?

  2. Should some friendships be avoided? Why?

Consider This

Gossip means repeating personal information about another, especially information gained in confidence—and that the person wouldn’t want repeated. Slander means repeating something about another that is false with malicious intent. However, gossip that becomes exaggerated, or contains errors, can easily slip into slander.

  1. In what situations are you most tempted to gossip about another? How could you preempt that temptation in the future?

  2. Have you or someone you know been hurt by slander? How, if possible, can slander be made right?

  3. “… gossip separates the best of friends (Proverbs 16:28). Have you ever said something about someone only to have what you said get back to that person? What did that do to your relationship? What did you lose? How can you fix it?

  4. Proverbs 11:13 says: “A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy man keeps a secret. (NIV) When a friend asks for advice, how can we know if it’s confidential or not?

  5. We’re tempted to spread gossip because having special knowledge makes us feel important when others want to listen to us. Read Proverbs 18:7-8. Why are we tempted to listen to gossip? Why else?

  6. According to Proverbs 20:19, how should we respond when someone starts gossiping about another person?

  7. When was the last time you were tempted to talk about someone behind his or her back? Read Titus 3:2. What principles should believers consider when discussing someone else?

  8. Triangulation means bringing your complaints against a person to a third person either for revenge or to get them to intervene on your behalf. Why is that usually unhealthy? Consider Matthew 18:15-17. What principles might apply in your family, your work, school, friends, and social groups?

  9. What is our responsibility to others regarding their behavior and walk with the Lord? (see Galatians 6:1-2, Colossians 3:16, and Hebrews 10:24-25) Is there someone you know who needs restoration and encouragement? How could you go about helping that person without making things worse?

Moving Forward

The best way to avoid slander is to avoid slamming other people, period. One good way to check our conversation is to imagine the person is right there, standing with you when you are tempted to say something about him or her. Could you put this principle or other principles learned this week into practice?

  1. Considering Proverbs 11:13, 16:28 and 21:23, should you be transparent with everybody? Why or why not? With whom can you be transparent?

  2. The bible teaches us to confess our mistakes (sins) to God, but also mentions confessing sins to other people. What are the benefits of confessing sin to others according to James 5:16? What are some possible difficulties (see Proverbs 11:13)? Do you have trustworthy people in your life to whom you can confess sins?

  3. According to Ephesians 4:15a, what two principles should believers remember when talking to people?

  4. Are there any people in your life who need reconciliation to each other? Should you get involved? (Consider Philippians 4:3, Proverbs 15:18, 26:17, and Ephes 4:3)

a. If you get involved, how? (See Galatians 6:1 and Proverbs 26:20)