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Message Notes
“The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.” —John 1:14
“And he left there and went to the region of Judea and beyond the Jordan, and crowds gathered to him again. And again, as was his custom, he taught them.” —Mark 10:1
“And Pharisees came up and in order to test him asked, ‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?’ He answered them, ‘What did Moses command you?’ They said, ‘Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of divorce and to send her away.’ And Jesus said to them, ‘Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment. But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” And in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. And he said to them, ‘Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her, and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.’” —Mark 10:2-12
How Did Jesus Raise the Bar on Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage?
He Made Three Declarations:
Declaration #1 – Let Nothing Separate.
- Because of the stubborn nature of people, God provided a civil manner to protect individuals and families from further severe calamities.
“And Jesus said to them, ‘Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment.’” —Mark 10:5
- Jesus defined marriage as a covenant between one man, one woman, and God for a lifetime.
“But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” —Mark 10:6-9
Declaration #2 – Let God’s Word Clarify.
Question – What does God say about divorce?
- He hates it!
“‘For I hate divorce!’ says the Lord, the God of Israel. ‘To divorce your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty,’ says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies.” —Malachi 2:16
- It’s always a sign of spiritual failure.
“So guard your heart; do not be unfaithful to your wife.” —Malachi 2:16
- It’s almost always destructive.
- Sometimes it’s permissible.
Question – According to God, when is a divorce permissible?
- When a husband or wife is sexually unfaithful and unrepentant.
“And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality,” —Matthew 19:9
Porneia – A broad range of sexual sins, not just adultery.
Moicheia - Adultery
- In some cases of abandonment.
“Now, I will speak to the rest of you, though I do not have a direct command from the Lord. If a fellow believer has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to continue living with him, he must not leave her. And if a believing woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to continue living with her, she must not leave him. For the believing wife brings holiness to her marriage, and the believing husband brings holiness to his marriage. Otherwise, your children would not be holy, but now they are holy. (But if the husband or wife who isn’t a believer insists on leaving, let them go. In such cases the believing husband or wife is no longer bound to the other, for God has called you to live in peace.)” —1 Corinthians 7:12-15
- If the divorce occurred before salvation.
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!” —2 Corinthians 5:17
Question – When is remarriage permitted in the Bible?
- A Biblical divorce has taken place.
- When an unbelieving spouse has abandoned the marriage.
- When a spouse has died.
“A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. If her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but only if he loves the Lord. But in my opinion it would be better for her to stay single, and I think I am giving you counsel from God’s Spirit when I say this.” —1 Corinthians 7:39-40
Question – What does God say about an unscriptural divorce and remarriage?
- It’s an adulterous act.
“And he said to them, ‘Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her, and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.’” —Mark 10:11-12
“And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.” —Matthew 19:9
- It’s not a continual state of adultery.
- It’s never easy.
Question – What if I am in an abusive marriage?
- Separate
Declaration #3 – Let Grace Cover.
- Divorce and remarriage are not unforgivable or a final failure.
- It’s never too late to invite Jesus into your marriage.
“‘Come now, let us reason together,’ says the Lord. ‘Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool.’” —Isaiah 1:18