The Book of Proverbs
Week 5
Zach Trimble
Part of Community Groups
November 21, 2023

The Text

Proverbs 5:1-6 (ESV)

1 My son, be attentive to my wisdom;
incline your ear to my understanding,
2 that you may keep discretion,
and your lips may guard knowledge.
3 For the lips of a forbidden woman drip honey,
and her speech is smoother than oil,
4 but in the end she is bitter as wormwood,
sharp as a two-edged sword.
5 Her feet go down to death;
her steps follow the path to Sheol;
6 she does not ponder the path of life;
her ways wander, and she does not know it.

Insight & Breakdown

Sex outside of marriage and adultery is incredibly common in American society. According to the National Institute of Health, 75% of Americans have sex outside of marriage before age 20. By age 44, the number becomes 95%. In terms of infidelity within marriage, according to the University of Utah, 30%-40% of people
cheat. It’s a staggering set of statistics. It’s strange when we think deeply about it because we realize adultery is the cause of so much pain. People divorce because of adultery, become depressed because of adultery, contract diseases because of adultery. Adultery has resulted in deception and lying, the breaking of hearts, and people even assault and murder one another over adultery. People die spiritually over it too.
Even for those of us who haven’t committed it, we understand the base desires that lead to it - and I don’t just mean physical desires, but emotional desires as well. Like many things in life, it’s easier to fall into sexual sin than we may assume. The numbers certainly seem to prove this, and the deceptive nature of sexual sin may be the reason why Solomon sought to warn his son about such a thing.
A quick housekeeping note about this passage: although it is cased here as a man guarding against a forbidden woman, I believe it also can apply to a woman guarding against a forbidden man. Solomon is talking to his son here which obviously will drive some of the language we see. Additionally, the “forbidden woman” probably serves as a juxtaposition against wisdom, which is personified artistically as “her” in many places within Proverbs. None of this necessarily means that the general lesson isn’t for both sexes. The forbidden woman shows up many times in Proverbs and other scripture, by the way. For deeper study, check out 7:26, 23:28, Eccl 7:26, and Gen 38:12-19.
Let’s make some observations. Verse 3 is well worth reflection. The statement about the lips of a “forbidden
woman” not only form an artful word play off of the “and your lips may guard knowledge” of the verse before it, but it also teaches a valuable lesson. It reveals a hint at how people fall into sexual sin - the forbidden person often tells you things you want and feel you need to hear. How many times have affairs started because a friendly person talks to the hurting spouse well or treats them better than they feel their partner does? It happens all the time. However, the text says in verse 4 that in the end she is “bitter as wormwood.” Wormwood is a plant that has an incredibly bitter taste, and which ancient people used try to kill intestinal worms. Verse 5 speaks of how her ways lead to death. Verse 6 provides a very sad insight - that “she does not ponder the path of life”. The adulterous person is totally disconnected from reality, not spending a thought on how destructive the actions are. It is totally “normal” now in society to have sex outside of marriage and even to commit adultery inside of marriage. This is so upside down, and people don’t even realize it - it’s not even on their minds.

Application

The challenge to all reading this is simple - heed this passage. It’s important to know that if you have made a mistake in this arena - that there is forgiveness through Jesus. It doesn’t define you. There IS life after. - Praise God!!! However, even if you haven’t made a mistake in this arena - you still need to guard against it. It’s easy to fall into. Reflect on the seriousness of sexual purity in scripture. Understand that sexual immorality causes incredible pain. Also consider that since marriage is designed to echo Christ and the church (Ephesians 5) that when we commit adultery we are literally lying to the world about God. Let’s stay humble and let’s stay aware.

Questions For Reflection And Discussion

  1. If you could put the big idea of this passage into one sentence what would it be?

  2. Read Matthew 5:28-29. What does it look like to be obedient to what this passage teaches and how can it help in our fight against sexual sin?

  3. What do you think has led to our society’s incredible comfort with sexual immorality. How can we be different?

  4. What are some tangible ways we can guard against sexual sin in our lives?

Notes