Sunday, February 18, 2024
How Does God’s Plan for Marriage Work
Dr. Corey Schliep
21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. —Ephesians 5: 21-33
a. “As an individual can find fulfillment only in a relationship with God, a family can find fulfillment only if its definition is designed and authored by God Himself. So, apart from knowing Jesus Christ, we can’t expect a family to be fulfilled, because God is the One who created man, invented marriage and the family, and wrote the book on how marriage is to function.” MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1981).
“The Bible teaches that God created marriage not as an end but as a means to an end. While personal enjoyment and sexual pleasure are part of God’s good plan for marriage, God’s purpose does not stop there. For God created the marriage relationship to point to a greater reality. From the
moment marriage was instituted, God aimed to give the world an illustration of the gospel. Just as a photograph represents a person or an event at a particular point in history, marriage was designed by God to reflect a person and an event at the most pivotal point in history. Marriage, according to Ephesians 5, pictures Christ and the church. It is a living portrait drawn by a Divine Painter who wants the world to know that he loves his people so much that he has sent his Son to die for their sins. In
the picture of marriage, God intends to portray Christ’s love for the church and the church’s love for Christ on the canvas of human culture.” – Platt
21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ —Ephesians 5:21
22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord —Ephesians 5:22
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her —Ephesians 5:25
The Power of Marriage
27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. —Ephesians 5:27
The marriage doesn’t create flaws in your character, it reveals them. Marriage doesn’t bring you into confrontation with your spouse, but rather confronts you with yourself. It forces you to pay attention/ the only flaws that can enslave you are the ones that you are blind to. Don’t resist this power in your marriage. Embrace it and invite your spouse to speak into your life, give them permission and begin working together to navigate how this will look and be done in your relationship. (Keller, 2010)
You get to have a front row seat to what the Father is doing in and through your spouse.
Prioritize!
In **Ephesians 5:28-29 **Paul likens the marriage to the health of your body. When your marital relationship takes a healthy priority, you are able to be at your best, when your priorities are out of sync with His design, eventually everything will deteriorate
Grace in marriage:
I am giving up my right to retaliation—my right to hurt you back!
“We never know whom we marry; we just think we do. Or even if we first marry the right person, just give it a while and he or she will change. For marriage, being [the enormous thing it is] means we are not the same person after we have entered it. The primary problem is….learning how to love and care for the stranger to whom you find yourself married.” Stanley Hauerwas.
Keller (2010) says, “Christian vision for marriage is to look at another person and get a glimpse of the person God is creating, and to say, “I see who God is making you, and it excites me! I want to be a part of that! I want to partner with you and God in the journey you are taking to His throne.”
Action Steps:
1) Work on your own heart first
2) Pray for your spouse and ask for His wisdom on how to be best for them
3) Give your spouse permission to speak into your life (Hew 3:13),
4) Talk with your spouse about how they can help you grow closer to Christ,
5) Discover your love style at www.howwelove.com
6) Discover your partner’s love language (“The Five Love Languages”),
7) Keep short accounts, actively work to resolve conflicts and learn together from the conflict to grow forward.
8) Find a mentor and/or mentor couple to help you learn how to heal and grow
9) Marital friendship: continually invest in truly knowing your spouse and building that friendship. Intentional investment and surrender are required
10) Get involved in your church community and take advantage of opportunities to grow
a. Men’s and women’s ministry
b. Celebrate Recovery
c. Grief Share
d. Sunday School and small