The Cause and Cure of Interpersonal Conflicts
James 4:1-12
Pastor John Talley
Part of The Mud Puddles of Life
October 25, 2020

1 What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? 2 You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. 3 You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions. 4 You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God. 5 Or do you suppose it is to no purpose that the Scripture says, “He yearns jealously over the spirit that he has made to dwell in us”? 6 But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” 7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 8 Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 9 Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. 10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you. 11 Do not speak evil against one another, brothers. The one who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks evil against the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge. 12 There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor? —James 4:1-12


The stark contrast between a life governed by

and one governed by cannot be when understood from perspective.

in our relationships is a direct result of , coupled with a .

I. Analysis of conflict 4:1-3

1 What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? 2 You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. 3 You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions. —James 4:1-3

  • A. A question – What causes conflict? 4:1a
  • B. An answer 4:1b-3
    1. Generally - “Adulterous people” 4:1b
    2. Specifically 4:2-3
      a. The pursuit of self-interest
      b. Spiritual manipulation

When we are guided by self-centered,

, and faced with , we will turn rather than turn .

II. Condemnation of conflict 4:4-6

4 You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God. 5 Or do you suppose it is to no purpose that the Scripture says, “He yearns jealously over the spirit that he has made to dwell in us”? 6 But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” —James 4:4-6

  • A. Stated 4:4a “spiritual adultery”
  • B. Explained 4:4b-6
    1. Interpretive issue 4:5
    2. Clear point 4:4-6
      a. It is enmity with God 4:4
      b. It is apathy towards God’s Word
      1. Accusation concerning our sin nature 4:5
      2. Instruction concerning our sin nature 4:6

We can try to

our self-centered, worldly wisdom all we want, but God views it as .

III. Correction of conflict 4:7-12

7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 8 Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 9 Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. 10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you. 11 Do not speak evil against one another, brothers. The one who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks evil against the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge. 12 There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor? —James 4:7-12

  • A. Stated – submit to God 4:7a
  • B. Expanded 4:7b-12
    1. Inwardly 4:7b-10
      a. Resist the Devil 4:7b
      b. Draw near to God 4:8a
      c. Deal with your inner attitudes 4:8b-9
      d. Humble yourself 4:10
    2. Outwardly 4:11-12
      a. Guard what you say 4:11a
      b. Guard against judgementalism 4:11b-12
      1. It is inappropriate in light of who God is 4:11b-12a
      2. It is inappropriate in light of who people are 4:12b

is the Devil’s playground; therefore, we need to navigate it successfully.


Small Group Questions

  1. What did God teach you through this passage and sermon? Share the work of God in your heart with the group.

  2. What questions did this passage and sermon raise in your mind? This would be a great opportunity as a group to use the Ask a Pastor feature and that way we can address it either directly or in the messages in the future.

  3. Why does God’s Word associate anger, hatred, and discord with murder (see also Matthew 5:21-24; I John 3:11-17)?

  4. What is your area of growth needed concerning the inward qualities discussed in James 4:7-10? What can be done to address this need?

  5. What does it mean to have the heart and mind of God in conflict?