Today’s Scripture
Ephesians 4:25-32
A major determining factor of which way your marriage goes depends on whether selfishness or selflessness reigns.
Knowing how to handle conflict when it comes up is a major part of building and keeping harmony in the home.
“Highly happy couples tend to put God at the center of their marriage and focus on Him, rather than on their marriage or spouse, for fulfillment and happiness.” Shaunti Feldhahn
Ephesians 4:25 Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth each one of you with his neighbor, for we are members of one another. 26 Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, 27 and do not give the devil an opportunity. 28 He who steals must steal no longer; but rather he must labor, performing with his own hands what is good, so that he will have something to share with one who has need. 29 Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear.
30 Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. 32 Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.
4 Keys to Fighting Fair - Conflict Resolution
1.
Proverbs 12:22 Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord, But those who deal faithfully are His delight.
2. Settle
A wise person once said,
“To keep your marriage brimming / With love in the loving cup /
Whenever you’re wrong, admit it / Whenever you’re right, shut up!”
3.
We could save ourselves so much trouble in our marriage if we would just watch what we say and how we say it.
Proverbs 25:11 Like apples of gold in settings of silver is a word spoken in right circumstances.
Give the right response at the right time in the right tone.
Never use words or tone that tear down, use words and tone that build up.
4.
The love of Jesus is our example for how we are to love our spouse.
1 Corinthians 13 (Phillips Paraphrase)
4 This love of which I speak is slow to lose patience—it looks for a way of being constructive. It is not possessive: it is neither anxious to impress nor does it cherish inflated ideas of its own importance.
5-6 Love has good manners and does not pursue selfish advantage. It is not touchy. It does not keep account of evil or gloat over the wickedness of other people. On the contrary, it is glad with all good men when truth prevails.*
7-8a Love knows no limit to its endurance, no end to its trust, no fading of its hope; it can outlast anything. It is, in fact, the one thing that still stands when all else has fallen.*
Selflessness is the key to Conflict Resolution
It takes mutual sacrifice to experience mutual fulfillment.
2. Discuss in a Life Group
DISCUSS:
Describe Selflessness and how it strengthens marriage
Has your conflict reslotuion improved since you got married? Why or why not?
Discuss the 4 Keys to Fighting Fair and which one stood out most to you and why.
Describe what “mutual sacrifice” should look like in marriage.
How does the example of Jesus fit in to this narrative of conflict resolution?.
3. Pray Together
Pray for each other and record any prayer requests here.